I’ve written before about my questions regarding those who enjoy boasting on being [blessed]:  blessed beyond.

Lately I’ve been in one of those {what about me?} ruts.  You know, the {life is not fair to me} feelings?

{No one understands.  Everyone is self consumed.}

{People have their own agenda.}

Truthfully, I’m not one to enjoy submitting to authority.  I question.  I don’t find myself enamored by anyone.  And I find most people’s motivations selfish.  Do I have a bad attitude?  I’ve been told that at times, by those closest to me.  But those closest would also tell me I’m smart, wise, and they know my talents.  And because they’re the closest to me, they’ve invested more into my life than others.

November 1st is All Saint’s Day, and that day’s reading in Common Prayer was a wake up for me.  Or at the very least a gentle reminder.

Fourteenth-century mystic Meister Eckhart said,

Do not think that saintliness comes from occupation; it depends rather on what one is. The kind of work we do does not make us holy, but we may make it holy.

November 1st’s scripture reading?  The Beatitudes.

Blessed are

the poor in spirit

those who mourn

the meek

those who hunger and thirst for righteousness

the merciful

the pure in heart

the peacemakers

those persecuted for righteousness’ sake

It’s easy for me to feel overlooked, overtired, overstressed.  It’s not hard to think I need to be assertive, which is unnatural to me.  I need to push harder.  Become.  Change.  Be bold.  But I was reminded when reading this, that’s not truly the case.  What I or others perceive is success is not necessarily so.

I shouldn’t follow some successful person’s plan in order to achieve.  I should strive to be a peacemaker, strive to show mercy, strive to be pure in heart.  That’s hard, yet refreshingly simpler than trying to be what the world perceives I should be.  Nor should I consider myself blessed because I have a car and my husband is not incarcerated.  Those things aren’t mentioned above, are they?  Interesting.  Opposite of the norm.