not yet winter

icy winterLonely.  Icy.  Gray.

It’s not yet Winter.  The season changes officially on December 21.  Yet it’s cold, literally below freezing outside my home.  So, it might as well be.

I’m not sure exactly why, but Winter disheartens me.  I’m a bit afraid of it.  It’s unpredictable.  It’s dark more than it’s light.  It brings the supposedly “happy holidays” of Christmas, New Years, Valentine’s Day….  Yet so often these days aren’t the best.  They invoke expectations.  They conjure up feelings, sometimes good, sometimes bad.  There are memories.  Thoughts.  So much associated with this season.

Please don’t label me a Bah Humbug.  I’m not.  It is interesting to me though, that this season we call a time to focus on peace, is often anything but.

I long for peace.  My husband mentioned last night wanting to live in peace.  I desire this so much for our kids.  The lack of internal conflict.  A feeling of being at rest.

The last few years I’ve picked a word.  I make it my word of the year.  Nothing revolutionary.  Just a word and/or thought to focus on throughout the year.  For 2013, I chose hope.

You’ve probably guessed.  Peace will be my word for 2014.  I hope to make it more than a word.  I want to make it a reality.  In my home.  In my relationships with the people most important to me.  In my daily life.

So here’s to peace in the midst of a cold, gloomy pre winter.

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