This is the harshest January I remember. It’s beyond cold outside. The ground is covered in snow. Navigating the streets is not easy. More harsh weather is forecasted.
Like the outdoor elements, I am cold myself. Figuratively freezing inside, like a brisk wind is blowing through my mind. Frazzled, feeling like something fragile that’s been left outside in subfreezing temperatures.
I was reminded today though of God’s love for me. Love, despite. My shortcomings and failures. Despite my faults and fears.
This morning at 9:30, I left a church service and returned out into the cold and snowy streets, carefully walking to avoid slipping on ice. Winter had not melted away during my time in the cathedral. Nor had the winter in my heart. Yet I’d experienced a quick, subtle moment of what God feels for me.
I am quite tired of the weather we’re experiencing in my locale. I long for warmth. Likewise and even more so, I yearn to be free of the frigid brokenness inside me. It’s impossible to know when the day of warmth will come. When Spring will finally invade wholeheartedly, both outdoors and in my very being.
Until then I try not to hide. I allow myself to maneuver the icy pathways I could only avoid through isolation and succumbing to fear. And I cherish the glimpses of God’s care.