hi, it’s the end

hi, it’s the end and here are my thoughts:

time with the people I love most is rare and precious.

acceptance is the hardest pill to swallow but I absolutely must get it down in 2022.

light is one of my 2022 words. light as in what we receive from the sun. light as in what the moon reflects. light as in the weight of my load. what I put upon myself. light as in “where you gonna light?” which reminds me of something my mom would say. as in place. where is my place to light? take that in a variety of ways, thanks. also accept. like stated above. accept myself. accept what is. all the while living in the balance of hope. if that’s possible. TBD. another word is listen. listen to my body. listen to others. listen to my own mind and heart. accept that I am doing the best I can meaning give myself grace. I have a card that says just that on my work bulletin board so here’s to obeying the card.

2021 hasn’t been the best. it’s rough out here. I have had personal failures and times [even today] when I questioned why I have to deal with the bologna I have to deal with. I don’t know if I’ve ever experienced a year in which so much seemed so unfair. not just for me. but for so many. I have asked God for a few [I emphasize few] items and he has so far delayed their reality. I am confounded. I am better off financially than I have ever been in adulthood and for that I am thankful. yet there are financial milestones I strived for in vain.

my hope is to complete, in 2022, a writing project I am in the midst of. take a trip. run lots of miles. walk even more. reward myself for small accomplishments. increase a college scholarship opportunity I helped develop. avoid unkind people. utilize pistachios in baking. take more photos. and do challenging things. amongst a bunch of other stuff.

it’s the end and that means it’s almost a beginning. yay for that. one of my most listened to songs of 2021 was Irene by Rodrigo Amarante. yes, he’s Brazilian. yes, the song is in Portuguese. go figure. another song I listened to a bit was Joy Oladokun’s Look Up. a book recommendation: Somebody’s Daughter by Ashley C. Ford [non-fiction]. I have continued to be a fan of crossword puzzles and the Headspace app and Unlocking Us aka Brené Brown’s podcast. I became a drinker of matcha in 2021. a highlight of the year was hearing Jamie play guitar in person again. hoping for more live music in 2022. a highlight was going to the ocean with Allie. cheers to waves and water. a high has been sitting in Erin and Jamie’s house this holiday season, celebrating ownership and newness. also witnessing a young woman move into a college dorm. a taco truck in a Cincinnati gas station parking lot [it’s the little things]. students who still call me Ms. Debbie and students who only know me as Ms. Glenn.

some of my long running passions have resurfaced. or at least I’ve been reminded by the Universe they’re still present in my psyche. I realized once again in 2021, I enjoy a project. therefore I have a few in mind. I have begun developing my own, personal rituals which mark time. lastly, and speaking of time, I purchased, in October, a gift for myself. it represents how far I have journeyed from what once was. happy 2022. may it be uniquely better for us all.

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